10 Women Experts Share How to Shift Your Mindset
By Sujany Baleswaran
Change is inevitable, and navigating those changes can seem like endless hurdles. Changing any aspect of your life begins with transforming the way you think. Do you have a fixed mindset or a growth mindset? From self-awareness to navigating negative thoughts, mindset plays a powerful role in our everyday lives. From business to relationships, everything stems down to the foundation and evolution of mindset.
What steps can someone take to transform their mindset and outlook for the better? What will you change in your life? We spoke to 9 women, from coaches to therapists, on transforming the mind as they share the benefits of coaching, personal stories, and tips to get you in the right mindset
Luise Sargent
Our brain is a memory box…
Founder of Therapy Point, a London-based counselling service for adults and adolescents, Luise Sargent has been practicing for 8 years, working for a family charity and the NHS.
Within my therapy room, clients can presume other people are having a much better time than them, social media has cemented that in our brains, but instead of looking at others, think about what you have, rather than what you don’t or can’t have. Trying a positive affirmation such as ‘today is going to be okay’ gives you permission to enjoy the day ahead.
Our brain is a memory box, it will automatically think the same thought you had this time yesterday, so if that was negative, guess what, today’s first thought will be negative. Think about when you hear a song, it can take you straight back to a time which made you feel happy or sad – that’s the memory box. We all have the ability to change our thoughts by suggestion. We aren’t expecting great things that could disappoint us, we are just saying, ‘today is going to be okay.’ Try it every morning when you wake up and give yourself permission for the day ahead to be okay. Sounds so easy, but actually everything starts from that first thought, so by choosing to be positive allows you to enjoy the rest of the day.
Mimi Bland
Tackle the feelings of insecurity and unworthiness.
Author of The Answer is You and a self-transformational mentor at the New Life Academy, Mimi’s 25 years of experience have offered her an insight into mind-body connection.
The biggest way to change our mindset is through self-reflection and developing awareness. We need to understand our personal triggers and see where from our past these triggers were installed into our mind. It is our upbringing, schooling and experiences from birth, through childhood to adulthood, that dictates our mindset and the parameters of what we perceive as normality. A person that has been a victim in their life, sees that as their normality, a person that was bullied or downtrodden see that as normality, abused or even sexually abused all becomes the norm for people that are experiencing these actions.
The biggest way someone can change their mindset is to talk openly about their feelings and emotions. Utilise a good coach to uncover the real you. Help you discover your true inner person that was original and undamaged, tackling the feelings of insecurity and unworthiness and do what you truly want to be or do. Once we have learned self-mastery and the art of controlling our mindset and our emotions, life starts to open up to us. We start to truly flourish and find our true purpose.
Ellen Patricia
The question is which one do we value more, comfort or success?
Consultant, professional coach, trainer and speaker, Ellen Patricia has led more than 300 learning events in Indonesia and abroad. She provides her professional services to individuals, as well as various organisations, including the World Bank.
As human beings living in today’s world, where changes in different areas of life often take place simultaneously, we face a lot of pressure to adjust to different fronts of life at the same time. As such, mind optimisation is definitely one of the keys to succeeding in today’s world. Our mind holds beliefs and narratives which help speed up our adaptation to the many changes in our world by reproducing what has worked before. However, what got us to where we are today may not necessarily bring us to where we want to be next, either in business, romantic relationships, or any other areas of life. In order to create and maintain success in this era, we need to be willing to continuously transform ourselves.
True transformation requires changes in the inner part of the self. Hence, to make it happen, we need something that can reach deep into the inner self. Otherwise, the transformation will only happen on a superficial level, and may not be long lasting. The journey of true transformation will always require us to go out of our comfort zone. The question is which one do we value more, comfort or success?
Carla Cohen
Look at the emotions underneath the thoughts you are experiencing…
Award-winning emotional intelligence coach and Founder of Women’s Health Revolution, Carla Cohen went on a journey to heal herself before bringing together more than 30 years of expertise in healing arts to empower her clients.
Making changes can sometimes be as easy as making a decision to change and then jumping right into action. Think of a boulder rolling downhill, it might need a bit of a push, but once it is rolling, it’s hard to stop it. The truth of the matter is that some people can do this easier than others. Once they hit that first or second rock, they have to roll over, they get stopped in their tracks. The reason this happens, and they get stuck, is because they have trapped emotions that are stronger than their vision for their desired outcome.
In my experience, the fastest way to transform your mind is to look at the emotions underneath the thoughts you are experiencing. As you reach emotional resolution, the thoughts don’t have the potency they did before, making it easier to stay in activity and build a new positive feedback loop. The feedback loop literally changes the neuroplasticity of your brain.
This is exactly how I lifted myself out of a health crisis that cost me two years in bed. I had to be willing to become aware of the emotions I had suppressed consciously and repressed unconsciously. This is not about spending years in therapy, it is about simply being willing to be present to what you are sensing in your body long enough to heal the trapped emotions and move from a red light to a green light in your conscious mind.
Aline Uara
Understand your own limits.
Resident wellness therapist and life coach at the Hotel and Spa The New Republic, Aline Uara has combined her knowledge of traditional medicine and massage therapy from Japan and her education on Physical Education and Sports Events to bring the best results to her clients.
In order to be able to live with a balanced mind, it is important to know yourself well to understand your own limits. For example, I know that I have the need to be surrounded by many people every day, so I avoid working alone at the computer, and always go to places where I can be surrounded by good people. Other people need to stay in their bubble and isolate themselves in order to work well.
There are 3 pillars of a healthy adult life:
- your relationship with yourself (hobbies, good nutrition and sports)
- your relationship with your professional life (working with what you were born to do)
- your relationship with people (surrounding yourself with healthy people who stimulate you in healthy environments).
The hardest thing in my life was noticing toxic people. I had toxic parents, so I had difficulties in learning to relate and to identify healthy and unhealthy people. Today, I am aware of this, and I have a list of toxic phrases and attitudes so I can detect them and keep myself and my mind away from that negativity.
Jodie Baudek
Once you plant those seeds, nourish them with a positive mindset.
Keynote speaker, mindset coach, best selling international author, and the founder of Essence Of Life Integrative Wellness Studios, Jodie Baudek provides online coaching programmes focusing on self-confidence, yoga and guided meditations.
It starts with giving yourself permission to change, to grow, truly not caring what anyone else thinks. Don’t share any of those thoughts or possibilities until you’ve actually started the process because other people’s energy can often change how you are feeling about something. If your soul is saying yes, then do it. Don’t keep looking in your rearview mirror. You were meant to move forward in your life.
Change is scary and wonderful at the same time. You often get really comfortable in who you are used to being but aren’t you supposed to grow, aren’t you supposed to level up? Every time you dim your light, make yourself smaller and shrink back, that is like giving a gift and then taking it away. You were given these gifts in life in order to grow and shine.
Ask yourself every single day what you are grateful for, what is a goal you have and what is one thing you like about yourself. Once you start finding what you like about yourself, that imposter syndrome that so many people carry, leaves you. The empowerment and encouragement to move forward and change that mindset is work for the rest of your life, but it is the most beautiful work that you can cultivate. Once you plant those seeds and nourish them with a positive mindset they just keep growing and growing. Appreciate you.
Sabina Casian
Perception equals projection.
Sabina Casian is an inspirational leader, TEFL teacher, rapid transformational coach, and parent on a mission to empower women to take the lead, motivate mums to educate their children with authenticity, supporting children and mothers in their learning development.
The key step to changing your mindset is to look inwards from someone else’s perspective and change your perception. I learnt through my coaching experience that if someone had trouble with having a positive outlook, it started with the perception of their own projections. The equation is quite simple: perception equals projection, which means that when you change your general outlook, you change the projection of that person for the better.
Transforming ourselves helps us to succeed in different aspects of our life, giving us the power and the right mindset to guide others through the same process of transformation. It might be different from one person to another, but with clear guidance and right mindset, anyone can succeed. Nevertheless, when we follow a clear guideline, it helps us to become more and achieve more, so we can certainly help others have the same success they desire in their life, whether it’s in business, relationship or love.
Joyce Wazirali
Looking at the world as if it were a reflection of my inner, personal development and trauma healing has brought me this far.
With over 30 years of experience guiding successful entrepreneurs, Joyce Z. Wazirali is the founder, CEO and author of Unity Conscious Leadership®, helping individuals, leaders and organisations to grow and transform. Joyce shares a moment showcasing the importance of positive mindset.
During the pandemic, I was invited to dinner at my friends house. A few days before our dinner, the government had implemented ‘social distancing’. It was still possible to go to dinner as long as we don’t cuddle.
I was looking forward to dinner and also preferred to stick to the rules. The night before our dinner, I called my friends. They didn’t answer. So I sent them a friendly message to let them know that I would follow the rules of the government. Result: no hugs.
They immediately messaged me that they were having a discussion about the rules they disagreed with, and that I was no longer welcome. To my surprise, I didn’t feel offended or angry. Instead, my heart warmed, and I felt empathy for them. I came to understand that their principles were more important than a good friend.
I became aware of how my mindset since childhood has brought me so much personal happiness and inner peace. Looking at the world as if it were a reflection of my inner, personal development and trauma healing has brought me this far.
Hayet Shahrezaey
We are perfectly imperfect…
Rapid transformational therapist and certified clinical hypnotherapist, Hayet Shahrezaey empowers others to develop their self-esteem, grow their confidence and manifest more money and abundance in their life.
Your mindset is shaped according to the experiences that your subconscious mind held on to as beliefs of how you saw things, and your mind then starts to look for supporting evidence. How you show up as the better version of yourself in the world is based on the right beliefs. Having someone to hold you accountable and help you dig deeper than you would have ever envisaged, leads to you discovering your hidden potential. This is important for your mindset to create what is aligned with your core values and have a better outlook in general.
One of the things that we all have in common is that we say to ourselves, I’ll be perfect, or I will be healed, and I will never have to work on myself again. This is a big lie. There is no perfect, we are perfectly imperfect, and you’ll always be working on yourself, because each time you reach a new level of awareness, your mindset will meet a new resistance, your subconscious will reveal new blocks, so the inner work continues, working with a coach or therapist on transforming your mindset will always be needed, because to experience life and to learn along the way, you need to keep up with the fabric of the continuously changing and transforming world we live in.
Lauren Lepley
If I could be that low, I could be that high, it’s science!
Lauren is The Go-To Mentor for multi 6 & 7 figure Entrepreneurs to Breakthrough The Next Level Of Success. She has the personal experiences and professional expertise to motivate and inspire both men & women needing to know they CAN breakthrough with professionalism, health and wealth to create a life of design, not default.
There have been a few moments in my passage of time, that have altered my thought processes, and ultimately my mindset because they’ve had to, from a survival perspective. Positive Psychology has come into this a lot, alongside the power of resilience.
When you are in a position of a potential excessive downfall from an external circumstance, it is too easy to sit in that space and let the externals continue to take you on the ride.
As I messaged my workplace to say I wasn’t coming back after my brother died in 2004 from suicide, I went into an immediate state of shock & complex grief. I promised myself that I wouldn’t ever let myself find myself where Sam was, again.
The only way out was up, and I committed to transferring the level of negative thoughts to the very same level of positivity! If I could be that low, I could be that high, it’s science!
I had all I needed, right there inside of me to do anything I wanted to. I became aware, accepted the situation, and took action, I affirmed my growth mindset.The basis of growth in any area, be that Life, Business or Wellbeing requires an openness to self-awareness, and also self-understanding. They are different.
We are where we are now due to the experiences we have lived through; we need to understand ourselves wholly to direct our thoughts into the now. This is where self-awareness comes in, we must be fully in the present moment, completely aware of our mind, our body and our energetics, because, well, we are one, there is no separation and how we look after our body, is how we look after our mind, is how we look after our complete existence.