The Power of You² – The Impact of Presence
By Inger Nordin
Have you ever found yourself preoccupied when someone is talking to you?
Have you ever focused on what you are going to say instead of listening to what the other person is saying?
If so, this is symptomatic of being on autopilot and not being present. Has this affected your personal/professional life? For most people it has. In today’s world it’s more important than ever to be really present with yourself and others.
Even though I had a successful career in corporate I realised in hindsight that I didn’t take the time to really be present with others.
- I was sometimes thinking of my needs and what their next step was to be when I was with clients!
- I was good but could have been so much better
Some examples that made me realise the impact, and importance, of being present
When I was working at Reuters News Agency – in an open office – I stopped listening to everyone around me to be able to concentrate and developed that as a bad habit. Taking it with me home – not really being there with my family — became a habit.
At a presence exercise in Morocco – we were sitting opposite each other looking into each other’s eyes in silence. Suddenly I got a really bad headache. When I, after the exercise, asked the guy if he had a headache he answered “No, but my eyes are really sore”. I realised that when I’m really present with someone it is like looking at them with a magnifying glass. You see things you normally wouldn’t notice.
As a constant learner I looked for information and found courses by ACLC (Advanced Coaching and Leadership Center), run by Ceil Stanford. Ceil introduced me to the importance of being present and to focus on being there and then and going within to find answers.
BEING PRESENT WILL HELP IMPROVE ALL YOUR RELATIONSHIPS!
What is being present?
- Really being there with a person, without doing anything else but connecting to this person
- Letting the noise of your mind go, or giving it no attention, just being with the person
- Being there and then, getting rid of everything else
Why is it important?
- To know what’s really going on with someone and noticing clues you may normally miss
- To be able to navigate your life you need to be aware of what’s going on around you to avoid the cliffs and pitfalls.
- You can see the beauty in the person in front of you. Whereby you increase your ability to appreciate yourself and others.
How will your life be different if you are present?
- People will respect you more since you are coming from an authentic place
- You will be more influential
- Your relationships will improve – be it personal or professional
- Your confidence level will improve
- In sales – better results. Being really present with a client will enable you to notice their feelings and connect better. They will trust you since you are authentically there in the moment.
- In relationships – more affinity. This speaks for itself – when you focus on a person, they feel noticed and closer to you. There is no judgement.
5 steps for you to start focusing on being present
First of all, it’s really important to have routines to follow.
- Be present with yourself in the morning
Use a gratitude process – Set up your day to win. Gratitude will change the way you act. I use the Gratitude Process from ACLC and Ceil Stanford this is truly setting my day up to focus.
Meditate – go within and anchor yourself. If you have problems with this attend the 21 Day of Abundance challenge on YouTube by Deepak Chopra.
Look into the mirror for 1 minute for 5 days and notice the difference in how you show up. Increase the time once you get the grip of it.
- Center yourself between meetings – breath. This is really important today when a lot of the meetings are online. Take the time to center yourself by just breathing.
- In every meeting be really there with the person (prepare yourself before). In example – if you have accountability meetings – start with 1 minute presence without talking – just notice the other person.
- Start observing:
In your family, with your business partner, etc. are they present with you?
Are you really present with them?
If you are in an online meeting – are you really there? Or are you, like most people, doing other things at the same time.
- Go from where you are (present in the now) – set your goals – take action. You’ll find that you’ll achieve your goals much faster and with better results.
The impact of being present for me: I was getting a surgery 26th of September 2022 and was starting the day with my gratitude process, meditation and focusing on being present with myself. Traveling to the hospital I focused on smiling at people around me and being grateful for getting my surgery. At the hospital I did the same and after the surgery I thanked the doctors and nurses. My operation went really well, and I got a lot of smiles back from people. Remember that you’re getting back what you’re giving out. If you have good thoughts, you spread those and people around you reflect them back to you.
Inger Nordin – Bestselling Author, Award Winning Speaker, Life & Business Coach, and Money Management strategist – have over 35 years’ experience from big international corporations in management positions. Her drive, goal- and result-oriented focus developed her great leadership skills. AFTER RETIRING she became bored knowing she had so much more to offer – missing being a part of something. She was missing learning because she’s a constant learner. Hence, she started a journey with personal development and started serving via her new company. She is the Founder and Owner of “IN Life Amplification” with a mission to help mid-life women step into their power – financially, personally, and professionally – without compromising their femininity. With a passion to help people to truly succeed her coaching is almost always based on aiding people to recover their life-force particles and gaining mastery over all areas of their life. Inger is a networker, connector, and inspirer – known for her big heart and always wanting to share and help others. Motto: It’s never too late to start over – I did it at 65 what’s your excuse.